No You Re Not Crazy Setting Boundaries With Your Spouse S Family


I don't know who needs to hear this, but let me tell you straight up: it is absolutely NOT your job to defend yourself or go to war with your husband's family. Seriously, why should you have to?

Here's the deal and it's crucial: your husband, your partner in crime, shouldn't even be taking you into situations where he doesn't have some level of control over the vibe. How else is he supposed to protect you, right? He's the one who brought you into this, so it's on him to make sure you're safe and respected.

Your Partner's Family? That's His Battle, Not Yours, Okay?

On that same note, when it comes to protecting our spouses, our own family should be the least of our worries. Let me give you a quick story from my own life, just like you shared: my family hasn't agreed with every single decision my husband and I have made. And yeah, they haven't always seen eye-to-eye with him either. It's totally normal, literally inevitable, and guess what? That's okay!

But here's what I can guarantee you: out of love and respect for me, they would never disrespect or mistreat him. Why? Because...

Disrespecting Your Spouse = Disrespecting YOU!

Anybody who disrespects your spouse does not respect you. Full stop. If someone truly loves and respects you, they wouldn't dare disrespect your partner. Because let me tell you, when they disrespect your spouse, they are absolutely, unequivocally disrespecting you. It’s two sides of the same coin eh, ingat tu.

If He's Not Ready to Ride or Die, It's Time to Say Goodbye!

And let's bring this full circle: if he's not ready to leave a situation (or let you leave it) when things get sticky, then sayang intan payung permata, you need to leave, and he needs to leave you alone. Any man who's willing to let his family ruin his own family (meaning you!) simply does not value you enough.

Now, don't get me wrong, these situations can be super complex. There are layers to this stuff, I know. But I had to tell you this because, well, I love you, opkos duh. And maybe nobody else has said it plainly enough.

Your husband should never send you into any battle alone. I don't care if it's just with your kids by yourselves (though even then, he should be involved!). But darling, he especially shouldn't send you in alone against people he brought you around, people you're only even with because of him, out of love and respect for him.

So, here's my humble ask: Make sure he loves you enough to respect and protect you every single step you take, every room you enter, every building he opens the door to. Because truth be told, you shouldn't be manipulated, coerced, or pressured into being in any environment where you don't feel comfortable, where there's a history of disrespect, or where you just don't feel welcome.

You are not crazy for not wanting to be in rooms where you are only tolerated and not loved. And yes, I said what I said, and I meant it in the realest way possible. K bai!


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