Who Knock The Walls The Lost Me

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Above picture credited to the owner.

Who Knock The Walls | The Lost Me. Little did i know am no longer myself, not who i used to be before. Some said i change to much but if i change for a better then i suppose nothing is wrong with that, right? I ought to be a different person the way i want to be..so just let me be. Let me find the real me.

Flashback

I remember when i was 19 i said to my sister " you're 27, why you not married? Aren't a women at your age suppose to be a married? Blah blah.." Pretty rude ain't i? Forgive me sister. And now i am 28, still not married hahaha what do we call it, kifarah huh? Lol. My advice is beware of your words. Yes sometimes word are just word but sometimes it hurts a lot and sometimes it comes back to you :P

Marriage

When i was 25 i was quite excited about relationship, getting married, start a family. I thought it was that easy as being said, i thought it is my goal but i was wrong. I don't know who knock the walls but the older i get the more i realise marriage is not a goal, it is responsibility.

One day my mom asked me question..

"Hey, when will you get married? You're not getting younger you know, day by day you gets old"

And i reply, politely..

"Mom, don't worry about me. I just wanted to be happy and that doesn't mean i have to get married. I am married when i am married okay. But not so soon".

Then i smile looking at her.

To be honest am not ready being tied to anyone. There is a part of me missing and i don't know what is it. At this point i just wanna be alone and enjoy my life, do whatever i want, go wherever i want. Despite the lost me..
Things will change, human n so is their heart..feelings, everything will change whether u want it or not, u accept it or not. u can't force a things to be the same like it used to be. whatever flows flows. what crashes crashes. It is what it is. - by me ^^by, cik itah @ ramaramapendek

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